2.03.2012

All of the Titles I Can Think of Are Offensive and Counter to My Point (if I have a point)

It's public therapy time with jimmy! There is your warning. Keep reading at your own risk. I will be whiny and self indulgent!

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I love my ex-wife. I will always love my ex-wife. I did not want to get a divorce but what was I going to do, demand she stay married to me. That doesn't help anyone.
Anyway...near as I can come to understand my wife divorced me in large part do to the fact that I suffer from anxiety. I was not getting it treated very well, are life was definitely not what we wanted it to be and my wife "was not in love with me."
So it struck me the other night at 5 am when I woke up for a nightmare (ironically in which my ex dumped me) that my ex-wife had pulled a Newt Gingrich. Newt seems to have a propensity for ending marriages when his wives are sick. Anxiety is an illness. My wife left me while I was suffering from anxiety.
I am not really saying this to make any judgment on her. I know that she would hate being compared to Newt Gingrich. Who would want to be compared to him?
I am writing this mostly for me because I need to understand that mental illness/disorder/whatever you want to call it is a disease. It can be treated and most importantly it is not who I am. I am not anxiety and anxiety is not me.
So, yeah... My wife divorced me because I was sick and she was done dealing with it. It happens to a lot of people. I feel like if I had cancer people would be sympathetic to me. But I sat around the house and watched a lot of TV while stressing about applying for jobs.
Well, basically I have completely offended my ex and demanded s pity. My only solace is that no one on the internets reads my blog.

1.05.2012

Literally the Funniest F***ing think i have seen all day

Thanks to the Chive
Keep Calm, Chive On

back to basics

It is not so much that I am perusing the internet looking for thinks to write about, but in my natural curiosity I am assaulted by things that I have opinions about. This is dangerous.
fill in your own segue, "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing"
I was walking home behind two college students last night. I am paraphrasing and naturally am adding my own spin to what they said but it was basically this one guy saying how as he was getting "smarter" he was noticing how many stupid people there are. and then he began to talk about how he should help these stupid people and if they could even understand him. And this wasn't an isolated incident. mere moments before in my booth at dinner I overheard some more students comparing pro-lifers to Mussolini. God, I hate college students.
Douches also use the word Irony correctly
To be more precise I am glad I am not a college student anymore because I felt the same way. I was so smart and I was learning so much and if i wasn't exactly better than everyone else my education could make me more effective. What a douche.
What I realized after I left college was that most people I thought weren't "as smart" as me were just as smart and knew much more than me about things I have never considered. But they also had lives to lead outside of reading esoteric volumes and discussing them with people. I can not say this enough but this does not make people stupid. Not having the time, the resources or just the motivation at the end of a day of working and taking care of kids and wondering were to put your next pay check to go to a class or a book club or some place to develop ideas does not make you stupid.
But I'm glad I went to college and glad I got to be a douche. Maybe I got it out of my system or maybe the douche stage does help in your intellectual development. For whatever reason that college students become douches they also seem to become productive members of society. Everyone in my family went to college. I can only assume that the privilege went straight to there heads (they went to fairly good "name brand" schools) and none of them are douches now.
I guess I would just like to say to that college student bemoaning the stupidity of people: don't worry, you will one day be that stupid too.

1.03.2012

"Hello Internet, How Are You Today?"

SandmanIssue #3 starts with the character John Constantine having a conversation with his hometown of London after waking up. I have always liked this little bit of dialogue from Neil Gaiman. It manages to encapsulate who the character of John Constantine is at that precise moment of waking up and getting breakfast. And this was only the beginning of Gaiman's run on Sandman.
But I digress. Basically I just like the line "Hello London, how are you today?" as a beginning and use it all too frequently in my head when I step out into the world. Which is probably why I titled my post as such because here I am stepping out into the internet ether with no idea what to say. So hello internet, how are you today? What do you have for me in 2012?

12.28.2011

New Year, New Me

So I am going to start writing again. Its not going to be easy.
Part of my problem with writing is my own self consciousness.
But I have said to much.
Be back hear next week for my opinions. Or at least ones that I think sound cool. Or ones that I know will piss someone off.

12.22.2011

Here ya go blogosphere

What better way to re-start blogging...
http://silentauctionriot.tumblr.com/post/14625540128/reblog-if-the-first-time-you-every-saw-armie-hammer-he

6.22.2011

The end is Nigh?

So, alas, the rapture has not happened yet despite another much publicized prediction. But what if the Rapture would have occurred if people like Harold Camping had not figured out the date of the end of days? For doesn't the Bible say that no one will know when it comes? I actually am not sure of that so if someone would look that up please... So maybe whenever a prediction is made it pushes back the Second Coming a little longer. Doomsayers aren't crazy, they are a necessary tool in keeping our society going. Maybe it will be the day that we accept or world will go on forever that we will finally meet our maker.

5.10.2011

Why doesn't facebook tell me when someone doesn't want to be friends?

I mean really. There should be some sort of notification.
My wife and i recently got divorced and a lot of "her" friends unfriended me. Not a problem really. I mean i like the people and wish we could have a continued mock relationship in some form via facebook but if they don't want to i completely understand. The problem comes with not saying anything about it. I mean i am just now finding people who aren't my "friends" anymore. It pisses me off.
But why? If i was in their situation would i really say anything? No. I wouldn't have. not before, anyway. But considering my marriage fell apart because I could say what was on my mind i'm trying to change.
Remember the early days of facebook when you had to say how you knew someone when you asked to be their friend? like LinkedIn? I'm not saying you have to give a reason to unfriend someone but if you knew the person was going to be notified might it change something? and maybe people would have less random friends that they did not really know.
I don't know. maybe it hurts because it feels like more people walking out on me. more people who i thought i knew and now i am not sure. and it makes me feel more alone... damn. that got a little personal.

4.13.2011

From the Mouths of Babes

Yesterday was free ice cream day at Ben and Jerry's and my daughter's school went for ice cream. I asked her what kind she got and she didn't remember. But she did like it. Funny how we change. I am probably much more likely to say precisely what kind ice cream I had but I would really have to think about if I liked it or not. Why? It's free ice cream!